Distractions

This morning as I am sitting in my office, there is a construction worker pounding on my window and using a loud saw trying to dislodge it from its current location. The window is being replaced to match our new church addition. Of course, since I am trying to write, this has me very distracted. Why is it that when I am trying to focus and accomplish a goal, distractions always come up? I don’t know, but it seems to happen a lot in life. Distractions can keep us from accomplishing the very things that we have talked about as being priorities. Goals that we have talked about or dreams that we have envisioned get pushed aside many times because distractions cause us to lose focus. I’ve found that this can also happen in our spiritual lives. In Luke 10, we read about Mary and Martha. They were sisters who had invited Jesus and his disciples into their home. Mary was sitting at Jesus’ feet, listening to what he said. “But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing. She came to Jesus and said, ‘Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me.’ But the Lord said to her, ‘My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.’” (Luke 10:40-42 NLT) Sometimes we forget how important it is to simply sit as His feet and listen. With all that has to be done it’s easy to lose focus on why we’re even doing it in the first place! The things that Martha was doing were good and necessary, but they were causing her to be distracted and even made her miss out on hearing from her guest, the reason for the dinner in the first place! Recently I have felt that God has been saying that same thing to me; that the things I’m doing FOR Him are hindering my relationship WITH Him. It’s hard for me to slow down long enough to just sit at Jesus’ feet. But I know that when I do, I am able to hear Him more clearly. The apostle Paul said it well in Philippians 3:13-14, “No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.”

“God, help me this week to remember that without your help, I can do nothing. And help me not to be so distracted by everything going on, that I forget to spend time with you. Help me to listen and hear what you’re saying to me so that everything I do glorifies you. In Jesus name, amen.”

Identity

This is a reprint of a post I wrote that was originally published at hopefellowship.blogspot.com.

Identity- 1. the condition of being oneself or itself, and not another. 2. condition or character as to who a person or what a thing is.

As a pastor, one of the things I love is getting to know people. It’s one thing to be acquainted with someone so that I can say hi when I see them, but it’s even more fun to me when I get to know who they really are. I have been fascinated over the years by the number of times I have been surprised by the beauty and depth of people. There have been instances when I’ve been forced to admit that I had made snap judgments about them that proved completely wrong in the end. It’s apparent that God has carefully crafted each and every one of us, and that His handiwork is never shoddy. The funny thing is, I think it’s easier for us to believe this about others (Well, most others…) ☺ than it is to believe it about ourselves. I have met so many people who think that they have nothing to offer. They have started to believe the snap judgments of others; those who haven’t stopped to recognize the beauty within. It’s so disappointing to see people settle for less than their true identity. Here is what I have found. I must accept and acknowledge that God created me and designed me for a purpose, and that I am who I am not by accident, but because God specifically chose my unique qualities. I love the words of Psalm 139:13-15 in The Message:

“Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother’s womb. I thank you, High God-you’re breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration-what a creation! You know me inside and out, you know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something. Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you, the days of my life all prepared before I’d even lived one day.”

It’s incredible to think that the God of the universe, who created the entire world, also cared enough to shape each one of us, both inside and out! So today, whose voice will you listen to? Who will shape your identity? “God, today I pray that I will see myself the way that you see me. Help me to also see the beauty in others, and see your craftsmanship in everyone I meet. Amen.”

Growing Up and Hearing God

My daughters are growing up too fast.  It's hard to believe that my girls are almost out of elementary school.  I recently set them up with email addresses, and so now I get cute emails and instant messages from them throughout the day.  It's amazing and a little scary to see them developing their personalities and independence.  One thing that I'm enjoying observing is their growing relationship with God.  I see them using the principles they have been taught at home and church in their interactions with their friends.  One of my daughters is especially inquistive about how God works, and has been reading "The battlefied of the mind (for kids)" by Joyce Meyer.  This is a really good book for her, as she has wrestled with fear and is learning how to ask God for strength and courage when she needs it.  The other night as Anne and I were tucking her in, she asked a great question.  She asked "How do I hear God's voice?"  At first I wasn't sure if she was asking this deep, unsimple question to prolong our visit to her room, or if she really was curious.  It became clear that she really wanted to know as she got out the book and began reading a passage that talked about hearing God.  I savored the opportunity to share with her about my own journey, and talk about how I recognize His voice in my life.  I am so glad that she is asking these questions and wants to not only learn about God, but to understand what it means to have a real relationship with Him.

So, How do we hear God's voice?  I don't have time to write a Theological study on the topic, but I will leave you with a couple of thoughts that I hope will cause you to dive in a little deeper.

1.  Be still and ready to listen- Psalm 46:10 says, "Be still, and know that He is God."  Our hectic lives leave little room for being still, but unless we stop and take time to spend with God, we might miss what He is saying to us.  When I am quiet and giving God my thoughts, will, and emotions, then I can focus on Him and become ready to receive.

2. "Open the eyes of my heart"-  There is a worship song that says "Open the eyes of my heart."  At first, being more of a literal guy, I didn't like that line.  After all, we don't have eyes in our heart! :) But the reality is that God is spiritual.  He created us as spiritual beings, with a soul.  When we can get past the distractions of the physical circumstances that we see with our natural eyes, then we can see clearly in the spiritual what God is saying to us.  In 2 Kings 6, the prophet Elisha's servant woke up one morning to some unwelcome guests, but Elisha helped him to see why there was no need to be afraid. 

"15 When the servant of the man of God got up and went out early the next morning, an army with horses and chariots had surrounded the city. "Oh, my lord, what shall we do?" the servant asked.

 16 "Don't be afraid," the prophet answered. "Those who are with us are more than those who are with them."

 17 And Elisha prayed, "O LORD, open his eyes so he may see." Then the LORD opened the servant's eyes, and he looked and saw the hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha.

When we only see with our natural eyes, we lose sight of God's power.  He is with us no matter what it looks like on the outside.

3.  If you feel like God has spoken to you, make sure that it doesn't contradict something God has already said in His word.-  For instance, I told my daughter that since the bible says in 2 Timothy 1:7 that God has not given us a spirit of fear, she can be confident that any thought that causes her to be afraid is not from God.  Since He is the same yesterday, today, and forever, we must make sure that we don't attribute something to God that doesn't line up with scripture.

3.  Finally, hear what God says and do it!-  When God speaks, take action.  James 1:22 says, "Don't just listen to God's word, you must do what it says, otherwise you are only fooling yourselves." 

Open up the eyes of your heart today and hear what God speaks to you! 

Donald Miller and the power of Story

I heard Donald Miller for the first time about three years ago at the Catalyst Conference. I was really impressed with his conversational style of speaking, and his ability to break subjects down to their core. After hearing him that first time, I read his book, Blue Like Jazz. That book really made me reconsider some of my core beliefs about what it means to be a Christ follower. It was a really good stretch for me. I still have a very different outlook than he does on a number of issues, but I appreciate the perspective that he brings.

Last week at the Echo conference, I had an opportunity to hear him speak again. He talked about how he has been studying writing for movies and television, and that his study of developing a story has changed his perspective on life. When he looked at his own life, he realized that his story wouldn't make a compelling movie. He talked about how the bible is full of compelling stories, and that all great stories have some common elements. The first element is a character; a character who wants something and is willing to overcome conflict to get it. He then talked about the fact that we are all characters in our own stories that are yet to be written.

There are some characteristics of a character that will cause us to cheer for him or boo him. One is that the character is not what he thinks or feels, but what he does. He gave an example from the latest Rocky movie, where Rocky starts off by befriending a single mom, rescuing a dog, and basically showing that he is a good human being. In a good story, the hero can't think more of himself than others, if he does he will cease to be the hero. In a good story, the hero always wants something. But it's not very satisfying unless what he or she wants is impressive. For instance, a movie about a guy who wants a new car wouldn't be that great. In fact, the best stories are the ones where the hero wants something, and if he doesn't get it, people will die. In our own life story, we should ask the question...what are we living for and what will happen if we don't get it?

Once the hero's motives are clear, and we know what he is going after, that's when the conflict usually begins. The moment when conflict gets so bad that the character thinks they're not going to make it, that's when the story is just starting to get good. As Christians, we have implied for a long time that if you are living for Christ, your life will be happy and carefree. But the truth is, that doesn't really line up with the stories of the bible. As I look back on my own life, I realize that the times that I have changed for the better have come through pain. When we go through periods where it seems like we're not going to make it, we need to remember that our story is just starting to get good. Maybe the pain or conflict in our own stories is just paving the way for us to achieve what we're striving for. In the bible, James 1:2-4 says, "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." As we write the stories of our lives, we need to understand that pain and conflict will come. But if we keep in mind what we are trying to accomplish, and trust God to be the source of our strength, then God will use our lives to create a powerful story that will speak of His character.

Power

Last Monday, a construction worker was digging with a backhoe on our property preparing the foundation for our new church addition. I don't know if he just wasn't paying attention or if he didn't see the warning flags, but he got a jolt when he hit the main electrical feed to our building. Fortunately, he wasn't injured, but the damage to the power line had been done. The construction superintendent told us that they had to turn off our electricity while they got the line fixed and the office would be without power for the rest of the day and even the next morning. As the lights went dark we started to realize how dependent we are on electricity. Since there was no power to our email server, no one would be getting email. Since the phones have to be plugged in to work, nobody could talk on them. The offering from the day before couldn't be processed because it had to be done on the computer. Basically, the day was over. Everyone went home because we couldn't do much without power.

It occured to me that electrical power is something we often take for granted. In the U.S. our power supply is pretty stable and we don't wonder if a light is going to come on when we flip the switch, we just know that it will. As I was sitting in the dark that day in my office, I realized that there is another power that I often take for granted. Acts 1:8 says "But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you. And you will be my witnesses, telling people about me everywhere..." As a Christian, I have access to the greatest power in history, and I truly believe that Jesus can make a difference in the everyone's life, but because I have become so accustomed to His presence in my life, I sometimes lose the awe and wonder that I should have. It wasn't always this way...

I Kings Chapter 8 tells the story of Solomon dedicating the Temple. The priests brought the Ark of the Lord's Covenant into the inner sanctuary of the Temple-the Most Holy place. When the priests came out of the Most Holy place, a thick cloud filled the Temple. The priests could not even continue their service, they were so overwhelmed at the Lord's presence. Clearly, they understood that God had chosen to inhabit His Temple and they had nothing but reverence and awe for the power that represented.

Now, because of Christ's sacrifice, I have the opportunity to pray to a God who is present and not distant. I have the opportunity to access power beyond all description.

God forgive me for taking you for granted. Thank you for your presence in my life. Give me the power that I need to live for you daily, and to tell everyone about your love. Amen.

Dr. Wood's Top Ten

In Yesterday's post, I mentioned that Dr. George Wood had shared a list of the top ten ways to know the difference between a good fight and a bad fight. Since Dr. Wood is now my friend on Facebook (along with about 1250 others), I sent him a message and asked him if he would send me the list since I wasn't fast enough to write them down as he was speaking. I was a little surprised that he answered me and sent me the list in the same day. Pretty cool! Here's the list:

TOP TEN -- IT’S A GOOD FIGHT WHEN . . .

(10) It’s not with your spouse.

(9) You don’t lose a single fruit of the Spirit before, during, or after the fight.

(8) You can lay your head on the pillow at night, having lain to rest any anger or bitterness.

(7) You gain nothing for yourself by winning.

(6) You don’t lose the war because you insisted on winning one battle, or you voluntarily lose a round in order to win the contest.

(5) You can help the other person to get back up.

(4) You fight fair even though the other guy doesn’t.

(3) You fight from principle rather than the power or prestige of your office. If you must frequently throw your weight around, you may be overweight.

(2) You still get back up after getting knocked down three or more times.

(1) At the end, the devil hurts worse than you do.

Ordination to Coronation

Last night I had a chance to attend a gathering of Assemblies of God pastors from all over North Texas. They had an ordination service for new Pastors receiving their ministerial credentials. The speaker for the evening was Dr. George Wood who is the current leader of the Assemblies of God. He has been on the job for less than a year, but is bringing a lot of new, good ideas to the table.

Dr. Wood's message was geared toward these newly credentialed pastors, but of course it resonated with all of us. He started by quoting from Steven Covey's book, the 7 habits of highly effective people, "Begin with the ending in mind." It's important to know your destination at the beginning of the journey. He talked about the apostle Paul who, near the end of his life wrote these words:

2 Timothy 4:6-8 (New Living Translation)6 As for me, my life has already been poured out as an offering to God. The time of my death is near. 7 I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, and I have remained faithful. 8 And now the prize awaits me—the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give me on the day of his return. And the prize is not just for me but for all who eagerly look forward to his appearing.

Dr. Wood challenged all of us to do three things; fight the good fight, finish the race, and keep the trust. In fighting the good fight, he talked about how sometimes there are good fights and bad fights in ministry. He had a great top 10 list on how to know the difference.

TOP TEN -- IT’S A GOOD FIGHT WHEN . . .
(10) It’s not with your spouse.
(9) You don’t loose a single fruit of the Spirit before, during, or after the fight.
(8) You can lay your head on the pillow at night, having lain to rest any anger or bitterness.
(7) You gain nothing for yourself by winning.
(6) You don’t lose the war because you insisted on winning one battle, or you voluntarily lose a round in order to win the contest.
(5) You can help the other person to get back up.
(4) You fight fair even though the other guy doesn’t.
(3) You fight from principle rather than the power or prestige of your office. If you must frequently throw your weight around, you may be overweight.
(2) You still get back up after getting knocked down three or more times.
(1) At the end, the devil hurts worse than you do.

He talked of a time he was called in to a small church that was going through division. An 83 year old man, who had run off several pastors in the past was very concerned. Dr. Wood asked, "What are you concerned about?" "This new pastor has moved the nursery from the back of the church to the front of the church without any consultation." Dr. Wood asked him, "Do you have any children in the nursery?" "No." "Do you have any grandchildren in the nursery?" "No." Then Dr. Wood said, "Then the nursery is none of your business!" He went on to admonish the man and tell him that he should be more concerned about reaching people for Christ in the last part of his life and less concerned about these trivial matters.

He went on to talk about "finishing the Race." In the 1968 Olympics in Mexico City, Tanzanian runner John Stephen Ahkwari was the last runner in the marathon.

He came in about an hour and a half after the winner, practically carrying his leg, as it was so bloodied and bandaged.

Film Director Bud Greenspan asked him, “Why did you keep going?” He said, “You don’t understand. My country did not send me 5,000 miles to start a race they sent me to finish it.”

Here is the video (duration 2min:19sec): Click here if you can't see it

There is an interesting comparison between the words Paul uses at the end of his life in I Timothy, and the words he uses earlier in I Corinthians:

1 Corinthians 9:23-25 (New Living Translation) 23 I do everything to spread the Good News and share in its blessings. 24 Don’t you realize that in a race everyone runs, but only one person gets the prize? So run to win! 25 All athletes are disciplined in their training. They do it to win a prize that will fade away, but we do it for an eternal prize.

Earlier in his life he spoke in terms of running the race and winning, however now he is saying that he has finished the work that God has called him to. Finishing is what matters most. But not only has he finished, he has remained faithful.

Dr. Wood concluded by encouraging all of the ministers to look at the responsibility of leading, teaching, and pastoring as a trust given to us by God. To hold firmly to the word of God and be unwavering in teaching sound doctrine. If we can keep the end in mind from the beginning, fight the good fight and keep the faith, then at the appointed time we can say like Paul, "the prize awaits me."

Hiding in the Baggage

A few weeks ago I was reading 1 Samuel 10 and an aspect of the story that I had never noticed jumped out at me.

The Israelites had decided that they wanted a king to rule them like the other nations. God spoke to Samuel that Saul was going to be the king, and so Samuel anointed him privately. Saul didn't mention this to anyone. When it was time to publicly install the new king of Israel, Samuel brought all the tribes of Israel near. First he chose the tribe of Benjamin, then Matri's clan, and finally...he asked for Saul son of Kish. Where was Saul? Was he there? I can imagine that this was kind of an anticlimactic moment in the proceedings. The whole country was waiting in anticipation to find out who would be anointed king, and Samuel has asked for Saul, but he's nowhere to be found. I wonder if they had one of those spotlights, you know the kind at the awards shows..."Now appearing, the tribe of Benjamin (cheers, cheers, spotlight moving around the building), featuring Matri's clan (yahoo!!), and now the star of our show (drumroll, drama building) Saul!!!!" The spotlight comes to a stop and focuses on an empty spot of ground where Saul should be standing....."Um, we're having technical difficulties, when we find the new king we'll return after these messages..." Okay, I'm sure they didn't really handle it that way, but it's fun to think about. But where was Saul? I Samuel 10:21-24 says, "But when they looked for him (Saul), he was not to be found. So they inquired further of the Lord, 'Has the man come here yet?' And the Lord said, 'Yes, he has hidden himself among the baggage.' They ran and brought him out, and as he stood among the people he was a head taller than any of the others. Samuel said to all the people, 'Do you see the man the Lord has chosen? There is no one like him among all the people.' Then the people shouted, 'Long live the king!'"

Saul knew what was getting ready to happen. His life would never be the same. God had selected him for a job that was way bigger than he had ever dreamed. Is it possible that he was having cold feet? I don't know about you, but it kind of makes me feel better knowing that even mighty kings sometimes feel like going into hiding. But did you notice that God was the one who told the people where to find Saul? God had chosen him, and wasn't going to let him hide for long.

What approach do you take when you feel like you are being asked to take on something bigger than yourself? I know that sometimes it can seem overwhelming. But, when you recognize that you can't do it on your own and you ask God for His help, then you can stand tall and face it. Besides, we'll come find you and pull you out of the baggage anyway. :)

Planting Seeds

This month at Hope, John has been talking about Jesus' parables and how they still apply to us today. One of the parables that he mentioned came from Luke 8:4-15, the parable of the sower and the soil. The basic takeaway is that when we share Christ (plant seeds), the effectiveness will depend on how ready the person is to receive it (good soil, rocky soil, thorny soil). In my experience, it's always worthwhile to plant seeds whenever possible. Only God truly knows if someone is ready to hear the good news.

This became even clearer to me this week when Anne received a phone call from some friends that we had in Tampa. We got to know them because our daughters were in the same class in school. Through the couple of years that we knew them, the conversation would sometimes turn to what it means to have a personal relationship with Christ. During the phone call she told Anne that her entire family was baptized this past weekend, and thanked Anne for "planting seeds." It reminded me of a lunch appointment that I had with her husband just a little over a year ago. After my lunch I sent an email to some friends (this was pre-blog). I thought I would re-post that email here.

"Today I was having lunch with a friend who is at the beginning of his spiritual journey. As I was sharing some of my life experiences with him I mentioned a time in my life when God led me in a certain direction. He immediately stopped me and asked, "How did you know it was God?!" I really appreciated the question, and I had to stop for a moment to figure out how I was going to explain that concept. Through that conversation I was reminded about what a privilege it it is to have a relationship with a God who is not distant, but is present with me and hears me when I pray. I told my friend that over the years my relationship with Christ has grown and I have learned to distinguish between an idea that I have in my mind, and something that God is leading me to do. It's difficult to put into words, but I explained that it's similar to relationships we have with other people. For example, my wife knows me so well, that there are times she knows exactly what I'm going to say before I even say it. Over the years she has learned my quirks and my tendencies and she can generally predict what my reaction will be. In the same way, as I have studied the bible, prayed and walked with God daily, I have come to know more of who He is, and what He would say about the situations that come my way. Jesus said in John 10:14-15,27 (NIV) 'I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me - just as the Father Knows me and I know the Father - and I lay down my life for the sheep.' 'My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me.' I believe that as you pray and ask God for direction in your life, He will answer you. This week, ask Him to help you to hear His voice above all of the other distractions that come your way."

I'm glad to know that some of the seeds that I planted in his life during that lunch began to grow. Hearing about his family getting baptized makes me excited! I can't wait to hear what else God has in store.

Honesty

"Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who his the Head, that is, Christ." Ephesians 4:15

Paul's words from the book of Ephesians seem simple enough, but in reality they're a lot harder to live out. Sometimes it's just easier to tell someone what they want to hear, rather than being honest. A clear example of this is played out every week on American Idol. Paula has such a hard time telling the contestants what she really thinks, because she wants them to be encouraged. She thinks she is doing the right thing, but actually she is speaking love without truth. This can be just as damaging as her counterpart Simon who regularly shares the truth without love. So we come back to this statement "speaking the truth in love." I believe that in order to speak the truth in love, there are a couple of things that you must consider. First, will the truth that you are going to share be beneficial to the other person? What will they do with the information once it is received. Will it help them change for the better? Next, what are your motives for sharing? Do you want to knock them off their pedestal? Hopefully it's because you want what's best for them and you are sharing because you love them.

I have fallen short of these ideals many times, but I was encouraged last week when I received a call from a friend in a church where I used to minister. There was a time when I had to have a difficult conversation with him about his participation in a musical group I was leading. He called me to tell me thank you for the way that I handled that conversation. I was floored! He said that because I was honest with him, it helped him evaluate what steps he was supposed to be taking, and he has actually used that example in his life to help others. Back when I had the conversation, I took a risk. But I was willing to risk the relationship because I thought that what I was sharing was in his best interest. I know that it can be easier to just sweep things under the rug and ignore them sometimes, but in the end, you will be better off when you speak the truth in love.

Verses to Live By

I'm a firm believer in the concept that it's the simple, foundational truths that mean the most. I've heard it said that "everything I need to know, I learned in Kindergarten." I'm not sure that's totally true, but I can see their point. In our spiritual lives, it's easy to make it complicated. We can get so caught up with the latest book, or chasing after some new idea that will take us to the "next level," that we forget the simple truths of God's word. A while ago, someone asked me to give advice to graduating seniors, and I came up with this list of four verses that serve as my life theme. I certainly don't live up to them all the time, and that's why it's always important to come back to the fundamentals.

1. Matthew 7:12 - The Golden Rule. Why is it so hard to treat others the way that we want them to treat us? Even though I learned this lesson when I was just a toddler, and I've tried to teach it to my kids, it's still something that takes work.

2. Matthew 25:22,23 - Small things matter! I've met a lot of people who complain about where they are in life, but have yet to learn this lesson. The way you handle the small things in life, whether it's at your job, the way you handle your finances, or even in relationships, will affect your ability to handle bigger things down the line. Use what God has given you, even if it's not a lot, and God will reward you.

3. Matthew 6:33 - Keep your priorities straight! Sometimes we get worried about our lives and what our next steps are. But this verse promises that if we stay focused on Him, He will make sure that we are taken care of.

4. Philippians 2:1-11 - Get over yourself! When you start feeling like you've given all you can give, remember the sacrifice that Christ paid to come to earth and die for us. Nothing we could ever do could repay what we have received.

What are some verses that you live by?

Pay Attention

Last week in our life group we were discussing a chapter in our book titled "Love Pays Attention." This quote really grabbed me:

"God's greatest commandment for building community is 'love one another.' A primary work of love is paying attention. It is such a valuable thing that we don't just give it-we pay it. It's like money."

I had never thought of it that way. When I talk to someone and give them my attention, I am giving them something valuable. I guess it makes sense, because I always feel more valued when someone gives me their attention. But the book goes on to say more:

"One of the great miracles of life is that God pays attention to us. This is partly why the writers of Scripture speak so often of God's face. The great priestly blessing that God himself taught the people of Israel says: 'The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.' (Num. 6:24-26)"

How humbling it is that the God of the universe, who probably has a lot on his mind, has the time to turn his face toward us and give us His attention.

I have really been convicted about this lately, and have started to make an effort to pay attention to those I care about the most. It really is difficult, when I have a lot of things swirling in my mind, to stop and look at one of my children as they tell me some tidbit that seems insignificant. The truth is, they probably don't even care that I know the information they are giving, but want to know that I care enough to pay attention. I don't always pass the test...

Last week, we watched the tv show "Supernanny." (I like to watch that show, because it makes me feel like I'm not the worst parent in the world). :) The nanny was at the home of Wendy Wilson, daughter of Beach Boy Brian Wilson. She made a comment that stung me. She said that her father was "not present. Whether he was at home or away, he wasn't available." She went on to say how that relationship had affected her parenting and every other relationship in her life. I want to be present for my kids...

This morning before work, I was sitting on the couch, drinking coffee and watching Good Morning America. Anne was asking me some questions when she finally said, "Mark, will you pause the show. I'm trying to have a conversation with you before you leave for the day. I've asked you seven questions and the only answer I have received is 'I don't know.'" She was right. I hadn't turned my face, or even thought about her question enough to give her an answer. The truth was, she really didn't need to know any of the information in the questions she was asking, she was just trying to get my attention. By not paying attention, I was sending the message that I didn't value her. Ouch. I guess I've got a long way to go...but I hear that acceptance is the first step. :)

What about Childcare?

If you've been involved in any kind of small group ministry before, where you are asking people to open up their homes and have people over to participate in bible studies, the question always comes up, "What about the kids?" If you have a church like ours which is predominantly made up of thirty-somethings with young children, it will definitely pose an issue. We knew that we had to come up with something that would help to overcome the obstacle to getting involved as a leader or a participant. We decided to create a night at the church for life groups with children 5th grade and younger. While the groups meet, children's ministry is provided. This night is not promoted and is not the "Married Couples Ministry." It is simply an option for those married couples groups with kids who choose to meet at the church. These are the only life groups that meet on the church campus. all others happen in homes. During our Married Couples Connecting Point event, couples with young children were identified on their name tag with an orange sticker. This turned out to be a great identifier, and helped couples gravitate toward people in their same stage of life. Some Married Couple leaders were trying to form groups that didn't include small children, so it gave them an easy way to find those who were empty nesters, or didn't have children yet. In the end, we had six groups who decided to be involved on Sunday nights. The groups who meet at the church all study the same thing at the same time. We meet together at the beginning of every meeting, and then split into our groups for discussion and prayer. So far it has worked great. We'll have our first challenge when we add more groups in March. But now I don't cringe whenever somebody asks the question, "What about Childcare?"

Connecting Point

Yesterday, I mentioned that our church had spent the last three months transitioning to a whole new system of life groups, and that we have doubled our involvement. How did we do it? We developed an event called Connecting Point that happens four times a year, for the express purpose of connecting people to groups. The reason why it only occurs four times a year, is so that there are a good number of people who want to be involved in a group. If you are connecting a couple of people every week, they would have to go to an established group. The benefit of Connecting Point, is that everyone who joins a group, starts at the same time. It also allows groups that are currently meeting to remain "closed". This is a difficult concept for some established groups to understand at first. They are so used to inviting people and marketing their group, that it takes a while for them to just focus on the relationships inside their group, and point new people to Connecting Point so that they can be involved in a new group. In some cases, I have found that leaders of established groups have felt relieved, because whenever someone had asked to be involved in their group in the past, they felt obligated to invite them, even if they really didn't have any more room. This way, they can talk about the benefits of the group, how much it has meant to them, and then point them to the next Connecting Point so that they can experience it as well. What happens at Connecting Point? Well, it's a little bit crazy and hard to describe, but I'll do my best. We have people register in advance so we know how many to expect, (you can see our registration form here). I also have leaders in place that have been through the training process and are ready to start a group. (You can see our Life Group Leader process here). When the event begins, I tell everybody there that the purpose of the evening is to meet as many people as possible. I give them some icebreaker questions, we have snacks and drinks available, and I tell them to just start meeting people. At this point, they shouldn't be asking about logistical questions like when or where a group will meet, but just finding out about who is there. The leaders are in the midst of everyone and meeting new people as well. This event is about people connecting to people, not just people connecting to leaders. There may be people who meet each other and think, "hey, I'd like to be in a group with them." Then they go together to find a leader. After the initial thirty minutes of mingling time, I have everyone sit down and I talk to them about the next step. I introduce the leaders who are there, giving a brief idea of their stage of life, or where their group is located. Then, I ask everyone to think about the people they met, and begin to connect in groups. I also warn them that God may be preparing them to be in a group that is not what they expected. They may have come to the event with an idea in mind of their "perfect group" and the group that they end up in may look totally different. But, if they will give it a chance, it may be the exact group that God had prepared for them. It's really cool to see how groups came together. There were even cases where a whole group would form, but they wouldn't have a leader. At that point, I asked if there was anyone in the group who felt like they would be willing to be a leader. When someone volunteered, I would "fast track" them through the leadership training over the next week or two. We probably started five new groups this way. It's amazing how God can work in these crazy minutes. After the groups form, I give them time to talk about the logistics of their group. When and where are they going to meet. Each group that begins that night is asked to commit to meet together for two months to see how it goes. This makes most people feel comfortable that they're not going to be stuck with people that they don't like. Everybody writes down their contact information and copies are made so that everyone in the group has everyone else's contact info. Then, the groups are given curriculum that the church provides to get them started. We use a book called "Groups: the life giving power of community." So, at the end of the event, everyone is in a group, has met the whole group, knows when their first meeting is, and has the curriculum they're going to use. Because there is already accountability, most groups have had a great turnout for their initial meetings. I know that there are probably some details that I'm leaving out, and reading this might prompt some of you to have questions, so feel free to post your question in the comments and I will do my best to answer it. What happens at the end of the two months? If groups feel like they are going well and they want to continue, the sign a Life Group Covenant together and commit to each other to meet together for the next sixteen months. Tomorrow I'll answer the big question, what about childcare?

Life Groups

All the way back on my first day here at Hope Fellowship, I was asking God to give me some new ideas for connecting people to life groups. As we were developing the mission statement that I wrote about last time, one of our primary focuses was developing environments where people could Grow in their faith, as well as grow in authentic relationships with others. The best way that we have found to accomplish this is through Life Groups. Life groups are small groups of people who commit to meet together for a period of time for bible study and prayer. The big question was, how do we get more people to understand the benefit of being in a group, and take the step to get involved. As I started looking into our life groups more, I discovered a couple of things. First, the method we had in place for connecting people to groups was clumsy. We would provide newcomers a list of all the groups meeting and tell them, "Go find one." The problem with that method was that there was a lot of hit-and-miss. Just by looking at the list, it was difficult to tell what type of a group it was, how long it had been together, if the people in the group actually liked each other, etc. The other thing I noticed was that if someone happened to meet a group member and they invited them to the group, the chances of that person liking the group went up dramatically. The only problem with that method was that there was no way to ensure that everyone was going to be invited to a group. Last fall, I went to a small groups conference and listened to the way that Northpoint Community Church handled groups, and I started to rethink how we structured our groups. There were two things that they said that really seemed to make sense. One, was that groups that start together seem to have a greater chance of staying together, and two, that groups were more likely to develop authentic relationships when they stayed the same without adding new members, or were "closed". The second point was something that made sense the more I thought about it. Many times I have spoken to leaders who talked to me about the "revolving door" of their group. They would have new people come into the group, and more established people leave the group constantly. Because they had to be "open", and their name was on the list, they were constantly "marketing" their group. Sometimes this posed a problem if they were a good leader, and word got out, and they had more people that wanted to be in their group than they could handle. All of those changes made it difficult to actually achieve the goal of the small group, which was to build authentic relationships. So, with all of these things in mind, we've spent the last three months transitioning our Life Group ministry in a whole new direction. The good news is that we've doubled our involvement in Life Groups, and I've received a lot of great feedback as to how the new groups are progressing. How did we do it? I'll tell you tomorrow...

Love. Connect. Grow. Serve.

If you come to Hope Fellowship you will be very familiar with the words Love, Connect, Grow and Serve. But I realize that many of you who read this blog don't attend church here in Frisco, and might be interested in some of the things that we're doing here.

Over the last five months, I've had the opportunity to be a part of our staff as we re-defined our mission as an organization. In the fall, we had a staff retreat where we asked the question, What would a fully engaged attender at Hope Fellowship look like. We wanted to rewrite our mission statement so that it would be more explainable and attainable. We wanted those who call Hope their home church to be able to share with others more easily what our church was about. Not only that, but we wanted our mission to include not just WHAT we want to accomplish, but HOW we were going to go about doing it. So, each of the words (Love, Connect, Grow, Serve) also corresponds to the ministries that are in place to allow these things to happen.

I'll give you a snapshot here, and then I plan to expand on these a little more in future posts.

Love God.
Our weekend services are designed for people to experience God's love and allow us to express our love for God together.

Connect with Others.
People can connect with our church in membership, come to a Connecting Point event (more on that later) to join a life group, or other events that we will have throughout the year that give people opportunities to meet others.

Grow in faith.
Life groups are small groups of people (8-12) that provide an environment where people can develop authentic relationships with each other while growing in their relationship with God. (We have refined our strategy for life groups. I will be giving more detail on this later.) We will also expand our "Grow" area to include Discovery (a four week class for new believers), as well as support and recovery groups.

Serve the World.
People can serve by being involved in a ministry team at church, serving the community through a local outreach, or going on a short term missions trip. The church also makes sure that 10% of the money donated to the church is given back out to support missions.

Even though it sounds simple, it took us a lot of conversation and prayer before we felt good about making it our new mission statement. Now, every ministry is being organized with these four words in mind. Our children's and youth ministries are using the same language so we can create continuity throughout the church. It also helps us to be focused on what God has called us to do, and is helping us not to be sidetracked by things that may be good, but will take energy away from our primary mission.

I have really enjoyed the process that we have gone through in developing this. I was also excited by how willing our staff was to take this on, and how they are committed to seeing it come to fruition.

Naomi

I recently read the book of Ruth and saw an aspect of the story that I had never paid much attention to before. I guess since the main character in the story is Ruth, I have always focused on her part in the story. But as I read it this time, there was something new that stuck out to me. One thing I love about reading the bible, is that no matter how many times I have read it before, God always has more to say to me when I read it again. The story begins with Naomi. Naomi has two sons who marry girls in Moab where they are living. After some time, Naomi's life encounters some tragic events. Not only does she lose her husband, but her two sons die as well. She is left alone with her two daughters-in-law Ruth and Orpah. Naomi decides that she is going to return to her homeland and urges her two daughters-in-law to return to their own homes because she doesn't figures they will be better off with their own families. Ruth, however, vows to Naomi that she will stay with her. She says (1:16-17), "Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the Lord deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me." Now in this exchange Ruth is showing an intense love and affection for Naomi. I think we can assume that Naomi was a loving mother-in-law who probably comforted Ruth when her husband died. I think that Naomi was truly looking out for Ruth's best interest, when she urged her to return to her family. I think that she valued Ruth more than she cared about her own happiness. So they returned to Bethlehem together. But it's there that Naomi tells her friends, (1:20)"Don't call me Naomi (which means pleasant), but call me Mara (which means bitter), because the Almighty has made my life very bitter." Now, she has many reasons to feel this way. She has lost her husband and two sons. Really, who could blame her. But as I read this story again, God showed me something. He had provided Ruth, whose undying devotion and loyalty was evident. Ruth could have left her and gone back to her family, but she chose to stay with Naomi and help her through this. Naomi was focusing on the wrong thing and it was causing her to be bitter. I can relate to Naomi. Not because I've experienced the same tragedy, but because I can easily take my eyes off of God's blessings and focus on what I don't have or things that I wish were different. Sometimes the very thing we're longing for is closer than we realize. At the end of the story, the women say to Naomi who is holding her new grandson, "your daughter-in-law, who loves you and who is better to you than seven sons, has given him birth" (4:15). Sometimes we can't really see the blessing until it slaps us in the face. These ladies help Naomi to see how God used Ruth, the loyal daughter-in-law and friend, to bring more happiness to Naomi's life than she ever dreamed. This has got me thinking, what blessings am I taking for granted today?

Disappointment

Being a pastor comes with a number of responsibilities. Because of my position, a lot of people come to me to help them figure things out. In a lot cases, it's energizing. There are many problems that have a solution. When I'm able to help someone think through the details of what they're trying to accomplish, it's fulfilling because I feel like I'm helping them become successful. A few years ago there was a commercial by BASF that said, "We don't make a lot of the products you use every day, we make the products you use everyday BETTER!" I could really relate to that statement because that's what I feel God has called me to do in the church. I love it when I can bring an idea or a new perspective to ministry that helps us to be more effective in our mission. That's when I feel I am accomplishing what God has asked me to do. But I've found that there are many problems that don't come with a simple solution. Especially when dealing with people's family issues, marriages, money problems, illnesses, etc. There have been a couple of times where I've been approached by a church member telling me about tough situations in a friend or family member's life and then asked, "So what can 'the church' do about it?" I know what they're asking. They want me to tell them, "No problem, I'll call the 'church hotline' and all of your needs will be taken care of." But many times there is no "hotline" set up to meet that particular need. Or a family may have financial problems that go far beyond what our church's benevolence budget can meet. Many times the person who is asking for help walks away disappointed, or frustrated that the church couldn't help them in their time of need. I'm not saying that help wasn't offered, but sometimes the help that is offered doesn't meet the level of expectation of the person, and is seen as no help at all. When that happens, nobody is more disappointed than me. I became a pastor to help people in their time of need. I truly believe that God is the answer, and that He can make provision in people's lives when they are struggling. Unfortunately, some of the people who ask the church for help don't have the proper perspective. They expect "the church" to solve all of their problems, when many times they are reaping the results of bad decisions that they have made in the past. When situations happen like this, it can make me feel like it's pointless even to try. Is what I'm doing making a difference at all? As I was praying about this situation, God reminded me of Galatians 6:9 which says, "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." Sometimes it would seem easier to give up, but I know that is not God's plan. I'm going to continue to ask Him for the wisdom to meet every challenge, and hopefully, even if I disappoint some people along the way, I won't be a disappointment to Him.

Boldness

Recently I was reading the story of Moses and was struck by a couple of things. When God first told Moses to go to Pharoah, he reacted with skepticism. "Who am I?" he asked (Exodus 3:11). Even though he was unsure of his own ability, he trusted God to use him. As the plagues continued, it was clear that Moses' faith was growing. When Pharoah finally relented and said, "Go, worship the Lord as you have requested," (Ex. 12:31) I wonder if Moses felt a sense of relief. I wonder if he said to himself, "I'm glad that's over, now let's just get out of here." If it were me, I'd be ready for some rest, but that's not what was in store for him. As soon as the Israelites had gone from Egypt, Pharoah realized what he had lost, and began to pursue them to bring them back. As the Israelites approached the Red Sea, Pharoah's army began to overtake them. This is where Moses made a bold decision. A decision to take a stand for faith, even though he didn't know what the next step was. "Moses answered the people, 'Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today.'"(Ex. 14:13) As I was reading this passage, it occurred to me, how did he know that the Lord would bring deliverance? When he had been approaching Pharoah in Egypt, God told him exactly what to do, and what the result would be. So, even though he needed the faith to follow through, he knew what was in store. But this was different. Moses boldly promised that the Lord would deliver, but God hadn't given him the plan yet. The next verses go on to tell how God instructs Moses to raise his staff so that the sea will part, and the Israelites can cross. To me, this seems like a defining moment in Moses' life. He knows the power of God, and the promises of God. In fact, he has had conversations with God in the past. He has seen God do what He promised, was there any reason to think that God wouldn't deliver them? I think there are times when we all have doubt about God's plan for us. We know that He is able, we just aren't sure if He's really going to follow through. If Moses had given into doubt or fear, the way the Israelites were, I'm sure they all would have been doomed. But Moses instead chose to speak faith, and God showed him the way. I wonder why God didn't tell Moses that this was going to happen ahead of time? Maybe it was because Moses was going to need that boldness many more times in his life. Today, I'm praying that I will be bold in my faith, and believe that God's promises are true.

Only God knows

Yesterday, my sister called me to tell me that her friend, a 32 year old mother of 4, had passed away after a long fight with cancer. It's difficult to find any words that would even begin to express how sad it is to know that those 4 children have lost their mother. I am praying that God will comfort them, and guide them through this season in their lives, and that their father will have the strength that he needs as well. Unfortunately, this is not the first time that I have experienced this. I have presided over and attended several funerals in the last few years of lives that were cut short by disease or tragedy. For those who are left behind, there are all kinds of questions that come up. Why did it happen? Was there anything I could have done? We prayed for healing, didn't God hear us? In most cases, we just don't have simple answers that can make it better. But for those of us who know God, it's important to understand that He still hears and answers prayer. He still has the power to heal (Isa. 53:5), but He also knows more than we can fathom about how these circumstances will affect others in the end. I have heard numerous accounts of family members coming to know the Lord through these events. We know that God is working for our good (Romans 8:28), even if we can't see how right now.

Today I was reading in the book of Genesis the story of Joseph. At the end of the story, in chapter 45, Joseph reveals himself to his brothers and forgives them. I have always marveled at Joseph's attitude when dealing with the circumstances that faced him. Here he was, with incredible power, and the opportunity to take revenge on the brothers who had sold him into slavery so many years earlier, but Joseph chose to forgive. In verse 5 he says, "And now, do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you." Joseph could see how God had worked all of these circumstances together for the very day when he would be able to help save his own family from becoming destitute. It makes me wonder about the loved ones who have left this life and gone before us. When we see them again in heaven will they say to us, "Don't be distressed, it was for this reason that God sent me ahead of you." In the meantime, keep praying, keep believing, and keep hoping.