Thursday, March 27, 2008


"Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who his the Head, that is, Christ." Ephesians 4:15

Paul's words from the book of Ephesians seem simple enough, but in reality they're a lot harder to live out. Sometimes it's just easier to tell someone what they want to hear, rather than being honest. A clear example of this is played out every week on American Idol. Paula has such a hard time telling the contestants what she really thinks, because she wants them to be encouraged. She thinks she is doing the right thing, but actually she is speaking love without truth. This can be just as damaging as her counterpart Simon who regularly shares the truth without love. So we come back to this statement "speaking the truth in love." I believe that in order to speak the truth in love, there are a couple of things that you must consider. First, will the truth that you are going to share be beneficial to the other person? What will they do with the information once it is received. Will it help them change for the better? Next, what are your motives for sharing? Do you want to knock them off their pedestal? Hopefully it's because you want what's best for them and you are sharing because you love them.

I have fallen short of these ideals many times, but I was encouraged last week when I received a call from a friend in a church where I used to minister. There was a time when I had to have a difficult conversation with him about his participation in a musical group I was leading. He called me to tell me thank you for the way that I handled that conversation. I was floored! He said that because I was honest with him, it helped him evaluate what steps he was supposed to be taking, and he has actually used that example in his life to help others. Back when I had the conversation, I took a risk. But I was willing to risk the relationship because I thought that what I was sharing was in his best interest. I know that it can be easier to just sweep things under the rug and ignore them sometimes, but in the end, you will be better off when you speak the truth in love.

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